Taking Things too Personally and Kite Flying.

I feel a lot like Charlie Brown, I throw my kite into the air only to see it tumble back to the earth.

I have studied the kite, I have read the literature on how to be a successful kite flier, but no matter how many times,it seems, that I throw that stupid kite into the air it comes crashing down.

Why do I take things like low blog stats, failing to win a competition, or unrecognized work so personally?

I think the key is in the ‘person’ part of the ‘personal’, that person being me.

It has nothing to do with the contest, the people who stop coming to my blog, or the fact that I haven’t received much in the area of recognition.

It does have a whole lot to do with me. I want it so badly.

I have lived most of my life not wanting anything, I just kind of drifted.

I had some dreams and some wishes, but those are not goals.

Now that I do want it so badly, have made goals, and set up steps for reaching those goals, it hurts all that much more to see those dreams come crashing back to the ground.

I have a couple of choices when this happens: A.I throw the kite away and give up trying. B. I, pick that kite up, dust it off, and try again.

I’m going with option B. How about you?

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6 Comments

  1. Yes! I am doing a lot of reading lately on overcoming the discouraging “kite-crash” effect and it is starting to take hold. Thankfully. I am not saying I see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it does seem to be getting brighter lately. I crave validation with hits and likes, but sometimes I think it would be better if I couldn’t even see them because getting them feeds my addiction for more, and the crash when I don’t get the attention is worse. It helps to know others feel this way. I am getting more confident, and I hope you are too.

  2. I totally understand validation. We want to know that what we are doing is worthwhile, and appreciated. But, is that you’re goal? I think that you truly love writing and that you would write no matter what. I’ve learned on my blog that some posts are better than others, and some readers relate more to some posts than others. But, I enjoy writing each one, that seems to fulfill my need. If it fulfills your need, then it is all worthwhile. We all have our blogs with different purposes in mind….each one is different. I love your writing, and I admire your style. As far as kites go, it depends on if it’s raining and which way the wind is blowing. If I had to depend on the right conditions as to whether I was successful or not, I think I would stop writing all together. That sounds very frustrating to me. Rachael, you are doing fine. No one tries harder than you do. But, you don’t have to win the prize every time. You ARE the prize. 🙂

  3. I had always been like this, but am less bothered by it these days (with the occasional drop into the worry-mode again). I think the main problem is not the need for validation but the time stream we set ourselves. People will respond and they do respond but they have busy lives, so we need to concentrate on stretching the time out further. For instance, with stats: they go up and down naturally, so we just have to wait for the days when they go up. Or, as you say, choose plan A!

    I think we sensitive types tend to shrink time.

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